


I Think You'd Really Make a Killing in the Repeat Business

by sunflowergalaxies



Series: Some Lives You Live, and Some You Leave Behind [2]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Also kind of, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Assassin!Five, Cute Ending, Denial of Feelings, F/M, First Dates, First Meetings, Fiveya Week, Meet-Cute, Nurse!Vanya, its accepted pretty quickly, kind of, slightly sassy vanya, they're both like mid twenties here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-10-01 22:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20420729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunflowergalaxies/pseuds/sunflowergalaxies
Summary: Vanya really should have a lock on her window.





	I Think You'd Really Make a Killing in the Repeat Business

**Author's Note:**

> Day 2- No Powers AU
> 
> Yay second fiveya week prompt finished! (Also second published fic finished!) Once again, I wrote this in like a day and I suck at editing so if there's any glaring errors someone please point them out!

There’s blood on her floor. 

This isn’t something out of the ordinary necessarily; Vanya’s been fixing her neighbors’ not-so-little scrapes for years. Mostly Diego’s, but Luther and Klaus make a fairly regular appearance in her apartment too. But it’s late, well after 3 AM, and she’s just gotten off what feels like the most hellish shift of her life at the hospital.

She loves her neighbors, she truly does, but if she has to close one more knife wound right now she’s going to take Diego’s throwing knives and toss them in the river afterwards. 

“Diego? Did you cut yourself again?” She calls into her dark apartment. 

There’s no answer. 

“Klaus?” 

Still nothing. There’s a light on in the bathroom, though, and she rushes over to it. If whoever it is can’t answer, then it must be bad. Flinging open the door, she’s greeted not by one of her neighbors, but by a tall man dressed in a dark, bloodstained suit. His head jerks up to look at her, shock and anger coloring his handsome face. 

“Who the fuck are you?” He snaps. 

Vanya frowns, brows drawn together in confusion and irritation. “Who the fuck am I? This is my apartment, asshole. Who the fuck are you?” 

He gapes at her for a second. Then his mouth closes with an audible click and he starts to move towards her. He doesn’t get very far. 

“Ah, fuck!” He doubles over in pain. 

“Is that your blood?” 

“You figure that out all by yourself?” 

Vanya resists the urge to roll her eyes, going into nurse mode instead. “Sit down. Take off your shirt.” 

He looks bewildered. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me. Sit down and take your shirt off. I need to assess the extent of your injuries. Though you really should go to an actual hospital.”

“No, no hospital.”

Vanya places a hand on his shoulder and pushes him down on the toilet seat lid. He sits with little struggle, she notes. “Fine. Then take off the damn shirt.” 

“Fine.” He glares at her, yanking the jacket and the shirt off. 

He’s in bad shape. There are several shallow cuts, probably from a knife, as well as a bullet wound and a deep stab wound in the stomach. His rib is probably broken too, but there’s nothing Vanya can do about that.

“Knife _and_ gun wounds. Someone’s been busy.” At his look of confusion, she rolls her eyes, “You aren’t the first person like this I’ve fixed up. Some of my friends get mixed up in some bad things.” 

She starts on his stomach, shoving some pain meds in his hand before laying out her supplies. 

“I don’t need these.” He hands them back. 

She raises a brow. “You’re gonna want them when I dig that bullet out. Take them now, so they have time to start working before that.” 

She gets the feeling he’s not normally so compliant, but he takes the two pills and leans back so she can work. He doesn’t make any noise, just grits his teeth and breathes harshly through his nose as she sutures the wound. 

“You really do this often?” He asks, after a minute. 

“My neighbor fancies himself some kind of champion knife thrower. I see him a lot.” She replies. 

“Guess I chose the right apartment to break in to.” 

“In this building? Absolutely.” She finishes tying off the last stitch. 

The bullet wound is harder. He grips her shoulder and grunts in pain as she removes it, nails digging in so hard she’s pretty sure he’s broken skin. After they finish, he’s gasping and flopping backwards, a light sheen of sweat on his face. He stares at her with glassy eyes as she sutures that wound too. 

“I’m sure you’re well aware that you should get actual, legal medical attention for this, though I’m assuming you won’t.” 

“It’d raise to many questions.” He pants. 

“For you and me both. Listen, you can’t tell anyone that this happened. I could get into really big trouble.”

He laughs, a little, though his voice is still weak, “That’s what I was gonna say.”

“Good. So I’ll finish up here, then you’ll leave and we’ll both never talk about this again.” 

“Agreed.” He nods.

He says nothing more as she finished patching him up, just watches her. His eyes are intense, like he’s trying to figure her out. Vanya looks up at him, ignoring the way her stomach flips when he holds her gaze. 

“What?” She looks back down, bandaging the last cut. 

“You should get locks on your windows.” He says.

“Huh?” 

“You need locks on your windows. It was ridiculously easy to break into here.”

“I’m on the second floor.” 

“People can climb.”

She’s skeptical. “Most people can’t climb to a second story window.” 

“I did.” 

“Yeah, but I have a feeling that you aren’t like most people.” She rolls her eyes and sits back on her knees. “Anyways, I’m all done here, you’re good to go.” 

She pats his knee and stands, giving him room to stand and dress himself. His movements are stiff, but he manages to shrug his jacket on without too much effort. 

“Thanks for the help.” He says. 

“Try not to get killed.” She replies dryly, “I’d hate for all my hard work to go to waste.” 

He smirks, and heads for her living room. With one last inscrutable look, he climbs out the window. Vanya shuts it behind him, watching as he scales down the side of the building quickly. Impressive, considering what shape he’s in. He lands on his feet, squares his shoulders and walks quickly out of the alley. 

Vanya sighs, leaning against the wall. She’s exhausted, her scrubs are bloody again, and all she wants to do is sleep. At least she’s off tomorrow, she thinks to herself as she heads for her shower. The bathroom is filthy, covered in blood and dirt and god only knows what else, but she can’t be bothered with that right now. She’s going to take the world’s quickest shower and then sleep for a million years. 

When she collapses into her bed, her last conscious thought is that she hopes that man is okay. 

He shows up again two weeks later. 

She’s lounging on her couch watching some ridiculous cooking show when her window rattles open and he slides in. 

“Oh good, you’re home.” He says, when he spots her. 

“You’re lucky,” she replies, standing up, “I switched shifts with a coworker. I was supposed to work tonight. Are you hurt again?”

“Only a little,” he assures her, “Nothing as bad as last time.” 

It’s only a couple of moderately deep gashes on his leg this time, nothing too severe, and Vanya wonders why he came back. She doesn’t ask, just sews him up and sends him on his way. 

The next day, there’s a small bouquet of peach roses on her front door. There isn’t a note, but Vanya knows exactly who it’s from. 

The fifth time he appears, she’s just gotten back from Allison’s engagement party, tipsy and red faced and having entirely too much fun just walking to her apartment. He’s sitting on her couch, reading one of her books when she opens the door. He looks up, almost excitedly, but his brows draw together the longer he observes her. 

“Are you drunk?” 

“Most definitely.” She agrees happily. “You came back.” 

“I did.” He smiles a little. “I find myself in need of your expert services.”

“Why don’t you ever come around just to say hi?” She’s way too honest when she’s drunk, always had been. Any semblance of a filter just disappears the moment she takes a sip of wine. 

He blinks at her slowly, “I wasn’t aware you wanted me to.” 

“Well, it’d be nice.” She huffs, crossing her arms. “Let’s get you all sewn up then.” 

“Are you sure you should be doing anything medical while inebriated?” 

“I have the steadiest hands on my floor at work, it’ll be fine.” 

He looks skeptical, but allows her to guide him to the bedroom, where he can lay on his stomach while she works. It’s difficult, but she sutures and bandages the one long cut on his back without incident. When he stands to leave, she scrambles towards him. “Wait!” 

He turns, buttoning his shirt as he watches her. “What?” 

“What’s your name?” She asks. 

“It’s Five.” 

She glares at him. “Don’t lie to me.” 

“I’m not lying.” He says, looking her in the eye. 

“It’s really Five?” 

He nods. “I’ll tell you about it when you’re sober.” 

“You better.” She crosses her arms and tries her best to look intimidating, which is hard to do when you’re 5’1”. 

His smile is indulgent as he pats her head and says, “I promise. I have to go now, Vanya.” 

She frowns, but moves to let him open the window. She realizes something, as he’s halfway down the building, and sticks her head out the window to yell, “Wait! How did you know my name?” 

He just grins at her and waves. 

The eighth time, he starts using the door. He’s waiting on her couch again, nearly giving her a heart attack when she flips the light on and sees him there. 

“Jesus Christ!” She shrieks. 

“You got locks.” He sounds proud. 

“Yeah, some weirdo kept sneaking in through the window at night.” She teases, setting down her groceries on the counter. “What's the injury tonight?” 

“No injuries tonight. I just came to see you, as you requested.” 

Vanya can feel her cheeks heating up. She had completely forgotten about her drunken words that night. 

“You’re cute when you’re embarrassed.” His words make her cheeks redden further, and a self-satisfied smile spreads across his face. 

“Shut up!” She says, turning away from him. He just laughs, which makes her stomach flutter nervously. He has a nice laugh, she thinks. Rich, pleasant. Her face feels hot as she puts her groceries up, extremely aware of his eyes on her while she moves around her small kitchen. Finally, she turns and says, “Can I make you a cup of coffee or something?” 

“Yeah, coffee. Thank you.” He sounds surprised, like he hadn’t expected her to ask. Maybe he just didn’t expect her to let him stay. 

She hadn’t been lying when she drunkenly told him she wanted him to visit just see her. 

She pours him a cup and walks over to the living room, handing him his and settles down on the couch next to him with her own. “So, are you going to tell me your real name now?”

He takes a sip of his coffee before replying, “I told you, Five is my real name. I grew up somewhere where sentimentality was discouraged. Names were just another way to get attached, so I was never given one.” 

“Oh,” She breathes, “That’s awful.” 

He shrugs, “It is what it is. It’s in the past now, there’s no need to feel sorry about it.” 

“You never wanted to choose a name for yourself?” 

“No. I like Five.” 

“It’s memorable.” She agrees. 

“What about you Vanya?” He turns towards her with a curious expression. 

“What about me?” 

He looks at her with a raised brow. “I told you something about my childhood, now you tell me something about yours.” 

“Like what?” 

“Where you’re from.” He answers immediately. 

“Like you can’t tell from my accent.” She replies, then sighs at his unimpressed look. “I was born in Russia, I moved here when I was eight.”

“You don’t have that much of an accent, you know.” He remarks. 

He looks like he wants to say something else, but his phone beeps and interrupts him. He curses, digging into his pocket to pull out the offending device. “Sorry, Vanya, I have to leave now.” 

“It’s alright,” She smiles, “Thanks for coming by just to hang out.” 

He doesn’t go to the window like she expects, but heads out her front door after one last look back at her. 

“Who was that handsome man coming out of your apartment last night?” Klaus asks slyly, while they’re walking to their weekly yoga class. 

To her horror, she blushes, and she quickly says, “No one. Just a friend.”

“Just a friend?” Klaus levels her a disbelieving look, “You can lie, but your blush can’t. I wanna know all the details of your exploits.”

“There are no exploits, Klaus.” She hisses, covering her face. “We just talk.” 

“No one goes that red over ‘just a friend’, V.” 

“The next time you injure yourself in a ‘totally not sexual fashion’ don’t come to my apartment.” She glares. 

“Ouch,” He says mildly, but smiles regardless. 

Her phone chimes, and she pulls it out of her pocket. It’s a series of texts from an unknown number.

_Hello. _

_It’s Five._

_I wanted to apologize for leaving so abruptly the other night, and I’d like to make it up to you. There’s a coffee shop and bookstore on Market, would you like to go with me sometime?_

“Ooh, are you texting him?” Klaus leans over to look at her phone. She snatches it towards her chest, holding it tightly. 

“...None of your business.” She mutters. 

“Alright, alright.” He holds his hands up in surrender, “No more prying from me, I promise.”

She smiles, and starts typing on her phone. 

_**Hey. I’d love to.**_

The reply is almost immediate. 

_Great. When are you free?_

_**I’m off Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday this week.**_

_How about Wednesday? 3 PM?_

_**It’s a date.**_

“That little smile is adorable.” Klaus comments. 

“Shut up. We’re gonna be late.” 

Wednesday comes quickly, and before Vanya knows it she’s stepping off the subway and headed towards the address he provided. She tugs on her scarf nervously, adjusting and readjusting it as she walks.

She hadn’t known what to wear, and with Allison across the city for some commercial, and being too embarrassed after the conversation with Klaus to ask him for advice, Vanya was left on her own to choose what outfit to put on.

She wraps her cardigan tighter around her body as she turned the corner and the wind picked up. She doesn’t think Five will care very much what she wears, but she wants to look nice. This is kind of a date, after all. 

When she gets there, Five is waiting outside for her. He’s just wearing a sweater and jeans, but it’s nothing like what she’s used to him in, and it makes her blush. He looks really good. 

“Vanya.” He greets, “You look great.” 

“Thank you, you do too.” God, she can’t stop blushing, and she knows her face is going as red as a tomato. 

“You’re blushing again.” He points out, grinning. 

“Shut up.” She says weakly, tugging open the door to avoid having to look at him. 

“I don’t think you actually want me to.” He calls after her, and she can hear the smug smile in his voice. It’s true. She likes hearing him talk, he has a nice voice. A nice everything, if she’s being honest. 

“Do you want anything to eat?” He asks, directing her towards the counter. 

“No, just a coffee please.” 

He orders them two coffees, and they sit down in a corner booth in the sun. His eyes are bright as he stares at her, sipping his coffee. 

“What?” She asks.

“Nothing. I just like looking at you.” He replies, smirking when it makes her blush and hide her face in her scarf. 

“Why do you always say things like that?” She asks. 

He reaches over and tucks a piece of hair behind her ears, “Because they’re true.” 

It’s sweet, even if it embarrasses her. She can’t keep the stupid grin off her face. She reaches across the table to hold his hand, even as her face is burning. 

They talk for hours, wandering around the bookstore and then down the street to some other shops afterwards, her hand tucked in his arm like some ridiculous historical romance. Eventually, it starts getting dark, and they make their way back to her apartment. Outside her building door, he stops and says goodnight, squeezing her hand and turning to leave. 

“Five!”

He pauses, and turns to face her. She stretches up and kisses him firmly, her arms going around his waist to steady herself. He kisses her back with a kind of desperation she hadn’t been expecting. It’s well contained, but some slips through the cracks as his lips move against hers, guiding her against the building with his hands on her cheeks. 

He breaks away with a breathless smile, wide and shameless. 

“Goodnight, Vanya.” 

Then he’s off, slipping into the evening foot traffic in front of her apartment easily. She’s left leaning against the wall, trying to catch her breath. Her fingers absentmindedly run over her lips as she watches people pass.

“Oooh Vanya who was that?” Allison is leaning out her window, looking down at her with a huge grin on her face. 

“That’s her ‘friend’,” Klaus sticks his head out of his window on the other side of the building. “I knew there were exploits! Vanya, we’re talking about this now!” 

Vanya rolls her eyes and heads inside, preparing herself for the inevitable twenty questions she’s about to get from the pair. Her phone chimes as she’s halfway up the stairs, and she stops to look at her messages. 

_So I have a pretty dangerous job tonight, and I’ll probably need your medical expertise. Just to make sure I’m okay, of course. Say around midnight-ish?_

She grins widely and replies. 

_ **I’m looking forward to it.** __ _

**Author's Note:**

> Vanya: Five? He's such an ass- *trips* *hundreds of pictures of Five falls out of her pockets* w-what no I hate Five these aren't mine- *slips on the pile of pictures* these aren't mine I-I swear I'm holding them for a friend- *more pictures fall out as she falls to her knees, desperately trying to pick them up* No, wait a minute juST LISTEN-


End file.
